YOUNG LEADERS RETREAT JANUARY 2009 DAY 4

Sunday, January 11

I may have mistakenly reported, in yesterday’s journal, that I “never get tired talking to young Timothy’s” (by the way, they do not have to be young or male). When I finally dragged myself out of bed just before 7:00am, I felt like a flattened toad on a lonely stretch of desert highway. I was pooped! I managed to get ready for the day, and fortified my resolve to face it with a couple cups of coffee (and berries, corn flakes and a muffin).

I felt a bit of a time-crunch, even though I did not have to be at church until 11:00am, because I had agreed to meet one of the guys an hour earlier to talk. And, by the way, I did not yet have a sense for what message I was to preach! Minor detail to some perhaps, but highly significant to me!

God is so faithful! Much like I had done the night before, when praying for the gang, I simply began with one verse that had come to my heart, and went to the (familiar) passage where it is found. I studied the passage by unpacking its key words/phrases, looking for themes/ideas that would remind me of what God has been saying to me lately, or what He has been saying to this group of young leaders the last couple days. That’s an approach I follow most of the time when I’m preparing a message. I just assume that the message has already been prepared by the Lord; my job is to “find” it in the text He draws me to study.

Almost instantly, I “found” it. I jotted a few reminder notes (i.e., key words and their meanings, a phrase or two to summarize/encapsulate key points) and off I drove to the Tshibaka home in time for more coffee, a portion of another muffin, and a good conversation with a man struggling to reconcile what he knows is true of God with feelings/thoughts he has a hard time discarding from his own way of seeing the world. Earnestly seeking Him will always be rewarded, and though we could not, in those few minutes, resolve much for him, I do believe that Jesus will lead him into truth—not necessarily a dogma, but a place of rest and trust in God’s ways and words.

Jesus doesn’t always answer our direct questions with an answer we can articulate to others, but knowing Him more intimately is, in itself, more than enough of an answer. Many times, I simply acknowledge that I do not know answers to things like the origin of evil in a good-God created cosmos. I don’t understand completely what happens to people who never had an earthly opportunity to hear the gospel. But knowing Jesus as I do mutes those issues; I believe He is good, just and full of mercy. I likewise know that I am none of those. So whose take will I trust when it comes to all those macro issues—especially the ones that pit my general/theoretical love/compassion for “people” against the Father’s intimate knowledge of and love for individuals whom He formed (personally and individually) in the womb.

After a lunch of great burgers and fries, I got to share once more with the group, and then Niki asked each person to testify about what God had done for them these days. I always love hearing such stories and resolutions from people. Some expressed lingering frustration and unbelief, but most laid claim to a profound work of God’s Spirit in their circumstances, mind or heart. How I applaud such honest declarations!

At 5:00pm I said good-bye and drove back to Baltimore where I met Lorrel and went to a movie with her. It was so pleasant to simply sit with my daughter and enjoy “Valkyre”!

Here are a couple short statements from this weekend and last weekend:

For myself, I really appreciated the chance to ask the hard questions. I hope you didn’t feel too grilled, but I desperately needed wise council on the tough issues such as divorce, church discipline and whether Jesus might reveal His scars at the last moment. I feel very “tided over” for a while now. In the end, I feel very much encouraged by 2 Corinthians (which you recommended) and will do my best to spread the word to the others back here. –J

I am writing you to quickly tell you that this was so impactful and strengthening for me in my own walk with the Lord. Things are really getting cleared up for me and because of your teaching, I’ve learned what it truly means to deny oneself and shed old perspectives. All in all, I feel a lot more comfort and clarity in viewing what the Lord is telling me to do for this next season of life. –J

I felt fulfilled, satisfied, pensive, and calmed. I realized that my place in the Kingdom of God is not that I should always be concerned with fixing myself, but rather, to come under others and lift them up in Christ; only then will I be wholly loving others as He has loved me. Your teaching has given me a new understanding of what it means to love others. I have found, it is a day after day struggle of dying to myself and placing the Lord first in my life. I cannot serve both God and man, but, having too acutely experienced the temptations and failures of what it means to serve man, I find serving God has rewards beyond my imagination. Praise the Lord for opening my eyes to things unseen! –R

Anyway, your little sermons throughout the day were so to the point and easy to understand. I appreciate your view on life and on the Lord and your desire to bring knowledge to others. I especially enjoyed the little stories you told along the way. I truly connected to the words you were saying and felt like you were specifically talking to me at times. –K